The Republican Reviewer 1st Post
by BrenRome
Summary: An OC story based on an upcoming project of mine. While visiting Florida, a new reviewer makes his first review debut. I own NOTHING but my OC.


**Hey there, guys. Sorry I haven't updated in a while, but I've been busy with a new girlfriend who happens to be on this site, and all. But I'm back for now with a new fanfic. This is a bit diffrent. Not only is it my own OC tie-in to Marvel's current big summer event that's tearing up the racks, Fear Itself, but it's also an introduction if you will. This OC in the story, is a reviewer character that I hope to bring to life by Fall of this year. This is his own introduction so that you get to know him a bit. This first chapter is his first review, and then the next ones will chronical his journey through Fear Itself. But I thought this might be a good place to start, so enjoy! Oh, and I own NOTHING but my OC's. This is for fan-purpopses only, I do not plan to make anything off of my Reviewer character now, and I never will, so please don't sue! Other than that, enjoy.**

In a Florida hotel room apartment, a man was fidgeting with his camera that he had set up. The man was around 18 years old, and had brown hair, slicked back. The young adult also wore a white buttoned-down shirt with a black sports jacket tux over it. He looked at the camera one last time before smiling to himself.

"All right, RR," He said, silently, "Time to make history."

With that, he pressed play, and went back to the chair in front of the camera, before facing it and speaking very clearly as he could.

"Hello and welcome to the Republican Reviewer show," The man said happily towards whoever may be viewing this, "I'm the Republican Reviewer. Your host for the show. Now, for those of you who are asking what the hell I'm doing, I'll explain it for you; on this show, I will be reviewing political-related material and tearing it a new one. Other times, thought I may like it and express why. That's all for you to watch and learn from though, so let's jump into action here. Since this is my first episode, and we just had the most unbelievable super hero box office smash-hit of the summer, I thought who else could we look at...but Captain America!"

At that moment, the song 'America Fuck Yeah!' started playing in the background while different images of Captain America started playing on the computer screen.

"Good old, Captain America," The Reviewer continued, "He's been through a lot, and it doesn't seem to be getting any easier for him. He's the Marvel Universe's current head of Homeland Security, he's the head of all of Marvel's Avenger's teams, he's celebrated his 70th anniversary earlier this year, and his new movie staring Chris Evans has become the #1 movie in America, while getting praises from (surprisingly) other foreign countries."

The clips stopped and the camera focused on the Reviewer again.

"So I decided to take a look at one of Captain America's greatest stories and see how they hold up today," The Reviewer explained, "So today, we're going to look at Captain America's origin as printed in 'Captain America Comics #1,' So let's go ahead."

Images of Cap's first issue started playing before the screen now as the Reviewer continued.

"So for the first two issues," He explained, "We're going to be looking at some reprints I just happen to own, but yeah, they have em in trade paperback form if your lucky. But I'm getting off-topic here. Let's dig in. We open up with Captain America saluting us as we see a bunch of men enlisting in the US Military. However, it turns out some Nazi spies managed to fake their own documents to get into the US, and they bomb a munitions factory, causing serious setbacks for the US. We then cut to Washington DC, where President FDR, (or at least a guy that looks like him,) is being briefed by two agents. The agents tell him that their worried that the entire US army could be filled with spies, but FDR just tells them that something is being done, and they are introduced to..."

The Reviewer stopped as he looked at the new character, and then back at the text.

"'J. Arthur Grover?'" The Reviewer asked confused, looking at the camera and then shrugging.

"Aw screw it," The Reviewer shrugged, "Anyway, Grover takes the two agents to a Brooklyn Curios shop, where an old lady waits for them. The lady tells them that 'The formula has been perfected, and [they] won't be disappointed this time.' They follow her up the stairs in the back of the shop, and find a lab right behind there, with another scientist who they never name."

The Reviewer sighed.

"If they introduce ONE more character I don't get the chance to know, I'm going to shove this comic up Dr. Who's asshole." He cursed, under his breath.

"Anyway," He continued, "The woman is revealed to be a hot black-haired chick, before the group takes their seats and watches Dr. Eriksine the man who created the Super Soldier serum. It's also at this point that we finally see Steve Rogers, still skinny and weak like how Evans was in the movie. Eriksine assures Steve he'll be all right as he injects the young man with the serum. We then watch with everyone in amazement, as Steve is transformed from a 98-pound weakling, into the hunk of a super soldier we know him as today."

"BUT!" The Reviewer read, as he showed the panel of the agent in the booth, "It turns out that one of the government officials was really a Nazi!"

A dramtic music played before they continued.

"Anyway," The reviewer said, "He shoots Eriksine and then the serum...for some reason...breaking it into pieces meaning no more can be produced. He then shoots blindly in the booth before Cap breaks the viewing glass with his hand and pulls the Nazi out."

At this point another clip from 'America Fuck Yeah!' played as images of Cap beating up the Nazi were shown.

"Anyway," The Reviewer stated, once the clip had stopped, "The nazi trips and stumbles into an eletrical machine, which fries him leaving nothing but charred ash. 'A fate he well deserved,' as Cap says. Soon afterwards, Cap goes onto being the US's #1 Spy Catcher, catching Nazi Spies, and preventing terrible tragedies from happening to the US. We then cut to Camp Leigh, where we see Steve Rogers talking to his partner, Bucky Barnes. Bucky exclaims all of Cap's heroics, and wishes to be just like him. 'Maybe you can be, Bucky,' Steve says, 'Just maybe...'."

"Of course," The Reviewer said, impersonating Steve Roger's voice, "That's if you promise not to get blown up on me, or die by falling into a ditch."

"Later," The Reviewer continued, "Bucky heads into Steve's tent, only to find him changing into his Captain America costume, and realizes that his best friend is in fact, the mighty superhero. Steve then imminently makes Bucky his partner since...well...Bucky's the only one who knows his secret, so there's your answer. The story closes with an ad for a chance to join 'Captain America's Sentinels of Liberty,' and receive a membership ID and pin for only 10 cents!"

"Well, there you go," The Reviewer said, putting his comic down, and staring at the audience, "There are some other stories in there, but I just wanted to cover the first issue, and introduce you to the basic first origins of Captain America and just explain how things will go like on this show, so thanks for watching."

He went to turn off the recorder but stopped when he remembered something.

"Oh!" He exclaimed, taking his seat again, "I almost forgot! If anyone wants to know, I'm hosting a tour right now here around the US taking Cap's shield around to different museums. I'm in Florida now, and will be presenting it there, so if you want to see it, then feel free to stop on by."

He was now done, but for some reason, he just stood there, looking at the camera.

"Okay," He said, looking very seriously, "This is the last thing, and I swear to god I'm done. Even though I call myself the Republican Reviewer, I am in any way, NOT a republican. I'm quite the opposite actually. And I just want to say this truly from the bottom of my heart; all the crap that's going on right now, what with the oil spills and economy debts, this is in no way anybody's fault but our own. I'm not talking about the PSA crap that other things try to brainwash you with. I'm not pinning it on the Republicans, or the Democrats, or anybody for that matter, but it's truly our own fault, and we've gotta wake up, join together, despite our differences, and save this planet now while there's still time. But nobody's bringing it up since the major news stations like FOX or CNN are owned by big fat fucking assholes who don't give two fucking shits if a nuclear explosion occurred outside their house and billions of people died because of them. So THAT'S why I'm doing this. To wake everyone up. So now that that's cleared, I'm turning the tape off and..."

All of a sudden, there was an explosion from outside the window, as the ground rocked, catching the Reviewer off-balance.

"What the hell?" He asked, going over to the window to see what it was.

What he saw almost made him drop dead.

"OH FU-!" He cursed as a car came hurtling towards his window.

**_TO BE CONTINUED IN THE REPUBLICAN REVIEWER: FEAR ITSELF (here on ), AND THEN IN THE REPUBLICAN REVIEWER'S FIRST ONLINE BROADCAST. (If he survives what comes next!)_**

**Reviews Appreciated!**


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